POEM ON THE OCCASION OF MY CANONIZATION
Goddess of chance and fortune, hear my plea.
Let me not hate, and put into my sock
Feathers not lead. I'll delicately mock
More often than I'll smite an enemy.
Because they are such fools – though vicious too.
And goddess, always keep me on my toes.
Save me from smugness. Years ago I chose
to see respectability as flu
It stops you breathing. After all these years
I'll take what small successes come my way.
And so I'm here. At Pride, also the day
I do my Paltrow, smiling through the tears.
Honoured to be, thanks to my friends, and Luck,
The Patron Saint of Things That Rhyme With Fuck